the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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