I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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