She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Randomize
