worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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