I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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