I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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