im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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