I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
