i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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