I can't watch pbs sober anymore
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
