only if we run a train.
done.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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