My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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