I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
