I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
