My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
