Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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