I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
