Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
