So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
