Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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