I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
