Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
