Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
