yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
