Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
