butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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