WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
