the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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