Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
