quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
