Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
