We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize