Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
