Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
