I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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