U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
