I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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