you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
