i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
just found out that she named her cat after me.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Randomize
