I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
