well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Randomize
