question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
