whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
She's the barista slut.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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