I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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