Cold hands, warm shart.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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