What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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