Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
