Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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