we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
