Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
