oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
vagina is talking i cant
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
