One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
